PERRINATOR.COM

I did some revisions lately in order to prepare for Level 2 next month, so I thought, hey, why not describe or write something and make use as much as the vocabs or grammar that I’ve practiced before? And then…this EVIL idea magically appeared (okay, so it didn’t exactly magically appeared, I MADE it to appear!) about writing…uh, describing…someone…someone that I’ve err…’created’… (those of you who know me surely knows who this someone is…) Hence, without further ado, let’s see how well horridly I’ve done…

<* Perrinator roars with laughter before continuing her SINISTER practical lessons… *>
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Madre mia!!! Esta es una puta fea! Tienes los ojos hinchados (como un osa panda) y el pelo corto maloliente. Ella es muy tonta, baja y bastante gorda. Tienes un lunar grande fea en su cara. Su nariz es como un tomate porque estornuda mucha! Sus manos y piernas son muy extrañas. Ohhh…sus dientes son negros!!! ¿Sabes que tiene muchas arrugas en su frente? Y hay muchos granos en su cara redonda! Es como una mina de oro! Jajajajajaja!!!!

También, ella es la persona más idiota del mundo! Le gusta hacer muchas preguntas estúpidas casi todos los días, como un niña que usualmente pregunta “¿mamá, por qué la hierba es verde?” Pero, ella no es un niña!! Así que, ¿acuerdas conmigo que ella es muy tonta?

Ah, también tienes un coche verde feo pero ella es muy perezosa lavar su coche. No sabe cocinar o hornear pero sabe comer. No sabe hacer las tareas de la casa pero sabe acortarse y dormir. No sé por qué su marido se casa con ella!! Oh, ¿quizás también él es tonto? Jajajajajaja!!!

La traducción (the translation):

Oh my goodness!!! This is one ugly bitch! She has swollen eyes (like a panda bear) and short smelly hair. She is very stupid, short and quite fat. She has a big ugly mole on her face. Her nose is like a tomato because she sneezes a lot! Her hands and legs are really weird. Oh…her teeth are black!!! Do you know that she has a lot of wrinkles on her forehead? And there are a lot of pimples on her round face! It’s like a goldmine! Hahahahahaha!!!

She is also the most idiotic person on earth! She likes to ask a lot of stupid questions almost everyday, like a kid that usually asks “Mom, why the grass is green?” But she is not a kid!! So, don’t you agree with me that she is really stupid?

Ah, she also has an ugly green car but she is too lazy to wash her car. She do not know how to cook or bake but she knows how to eat. She do not know how to do housework but she knows how to go to bed and sleep. I don’t know why her husband marries her!! Oh, perhaps he’s stupid too? Hahahahaha!!!!

Oh dear me, if there are any Spanish-speaking people or Spaniards who happen to chance upon this entry of mine, do help me correct my mistakes (I’m sure there are plenty!).